Don’t question why she needs to be so free
She’ll tell you it’s the only way to be
She just can’t be chained
To a life where nothings gained
And nothings lost, at such a cost
—Ruby Tuesday, The Rolling Stones
Nadira Shula Sayyida, or Rare Flame Leide [Lady], is what I consider my spirit’s chosen nomen. I accepted the name and its spiritual resonances around this time back in Tañyi of twenty-thirteen. At that point in life and two years deep in love, my King and I were finally beginning to shape together a concrete future with each other. Subsequently, our spiritual lives had just begun a dramatic and somewhat catastrophic shifting of the unusual sorts.
It was as if all at once we were both hurled face first into an abyss of ever-expanding knowledge, enlightenment, and emotions.
Furthermore, it was at that point that I began embarking on a journey back to self, back to oneness, back to infinite love—and although King’s journey was happening simultaneously parallel to my own, believe you me, our two worlds looked grotesquely avant-garde. From ominously pleasant dreams to straight-up wtf nightmares and secularly biblical revelations our lives went so far left …or right—eh, regardless in the great big sea of life we’ll just say we were tossed and driven by relentless waves many, many times. And in the midst of it all, we were forced to pause—to meditate on life, past, present, and future.
Out of our pause came new names —and those are not to be confused with our native nomens and appellations, our throne names, or our stage names. No, Nadira Shula Sayyida, is the name my spirit chose to insure I, my spirit and my soul, remain anchored in who I am, what I am, and why I have returned to earth plane this lifetime.